Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
