We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Randomize
