Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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