i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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