Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
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Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
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He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
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