Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize