I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
