I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I asked a girl to buy her a drink, she had I have a boyfriend, so I said, well i have a goldfish, she said what? I replied, oh I'm sorry I thought we were talking about shit that doesnt matter.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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