there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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