it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
