HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
