Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
