He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
should my penis look like a turkey
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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