Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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