you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
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