He kissed a someone with a penis
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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