IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
