You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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