Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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