Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
