But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
