I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
