If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
false alarm. still invincible.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
