I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
