Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
