Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
