they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
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