Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
