you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
