new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
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