She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Randomize
