that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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