Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize
