I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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