no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Randomize
