You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
