ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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