Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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