i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
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She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
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You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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