very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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