:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
