smell my finger.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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