i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
