who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
So vagazzling was a success
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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