drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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