Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
