She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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