you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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