Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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