thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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