it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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