420 ftw
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
